Depression

So I'm suffering depression...I'm having low self esteem. I suppose.....I lost inspiration on what to draw...I need to practice more.....I um...idk I feel ugly....I almost committed suicide........I was convinced not to..I just...I need more inspiration...something is missing in my life....I feel neglected by my own friends...I hate going to school now....I lost a friend...and her own appearance makes my life worse. It's like her life is getting better the mine, her drawings make mine look stupid. Anyway.,..I need more practice...I may be gone for a while...